Saturday, April 6, 2013

Khawluma in tih vawh dan

Khua a rawn lum leh chho a, nipui vanglai kan thleng chho leh dawn. Pawisa neih loh phei chuan AC tha tak tak te neih a harsa a, engtin nge man tlawm si a kan thlan kan tih daih theih ang? I lo thlir ang!

1. Bucket ah tui dah la, towel te emaw gamchha emaw chiah huh la. Sawr fu leh la. Tichuan, i kawr phelh in bat hnap rawh. Fan in chhem tir la, a vawt  sang sang mai ang. A ro hunah chutiang bawk chuan tih leh mai tur.

2. Current a awm loh a, fan a on theih loh hian a buaithlak thin hle. Chutiang ah chuan Blanket in in khuh thlan dup la, minute 10 vel i inkhuh hnu ah hlip rawh le. LG Air Conditioner aia a nawm lohna vak i hre lovang.

3. I inbual zawh veleh inhru hul lovin Ceiling fan hnuai zawn ah puan emaw phah la. Bawhkhup in, dawrh deuhin, saruak ngal ngatin mu rawh. Fan chu on la, i mawng hmul te chu chhem thlek tir siau siau rawh le. Hetiang hi Greek mifing hmasa ten “Phesiaus” an ti hial. In tih thlan daih nan an lo hmang nasa tawh thin a ni.

4. Kawngpui an maia awm in nih chuan thil awlsam tak mai pakhat a awm a. Bus/Truck emaw motor lian chak taka an rawn tlan hian an boruak rawn tawn phei hian a rawn zui nasa thin a. Chung motor rawn tlan chu lo chang char char la, a rawn tlan pelh veleh che kawngpuiah chuan va ding la, thli thaw nuam tak si, reilo te ni si, hlu bawk si a thlawn in i dawng dawn zu nia. A thawt zawh veleh let leh vat tur, chuti lo chu hun lo pui ah YMA no kan dawm palh ange.

5. I hang tur a ni. Mi ngo ai chuan mi hang te hian lum an tuar thei zawk niin a lang. Ni sa tawk takah te pawh hian an hlim diai bik zel.

6. Thlangra keng chhuak la. Lehkhapuan leh pen keng tel bawk la. Hmun pakhat ah lo ding la, mi lokal apiang chu thlangra chu lo ken tir la. “Sang deuhin han keng teh ,“  ti la, a tih veleh thil eng engemaw ziak thla nuaih la. “Hniam deuhah han keng leh teh,” ti la, thil ziak thla leh neuh neuh la. “Rang deuhin han han zap teh,” ti leh la, a thlawnin i in zah tir a lo ni reng mai. A hah hma in i kal tir anga, a chhan an zawh che chuan i zirlaia i mamawh thil a nih thu i hrilh dawn nia. Mi sawm vel i in zah tir chuan a vawt nuam sawng sawng tawh mai ang.

7. Motor sil na dawr velah hian thil pawimawh ti ni awm takin lo tei ve sek la, a nuam duh seng seng ania.

8. Mut hma in thosilen chiah huh la, zar leh la. Mut a nuam duh khawp mai. Mumangah star te hmuh an awl raps, kan lo inkuah lum chuk chuk zel!

9. PHE tui sem zui la, tui i khawih i khawih chuan tlai lamah vawt i ti ngei ngei ang.

10. “Vanilla Ice – Ice Ice Baby” hi vawt i tih hma chu ngaithla char char zel rawh.

Thursday, February 28, 2013

The Drunkard's Prayer

Father, look down on us your humble and at the same time proud, obedient, awesome drunk servants who are doomed to loiter in the street, puking, dancing, singing and harlem shaking in tights. We beseech you, O Lord, to guide us home without being caught by the City Police, chased by the YMA duties and that our left over liquor stays safe in our underwear or wherever we hide them.

Give us this day, a good – up and running phone network so that we may call our agents to make sure our brand is available. We pray that our friends do not mix our drinks with Zawlaidi or local “funte” and that they bring ice cubes, chips, water and dispo cups instead.

Lead us to good, safe, dark and quiet spot within the city where one can sit and talk about religion, politics, sex and science comfortably. Give us the wisdom to notice whether a vehicle is coming or not and the wisdom to speak about anything seriously ‘Like a Sir’ when someone walks by unexpectedly.

Grant us the strength to not cry over our exes, the strength to stay awake till we get home and the strength to hold ourselves from intense generosity that often left our wallets empty in the morning.

Dear God, protect my friends from getting into fights on the way they can’t afford. Lead them not into temptation for they know not what they do.

Almighty Father, save my friends from making fools of themselves in parties and picnics. Keep our partners safe at wherever they dwell and if they cheat; do not forgive them their trespasses for they know exactly what they do.

And when we get home, grant us the instant “ninja-mode” to sneak in quietly to our room without getting noticed by the neighbours, parents and the dog. So that we may sleep tight in our beds and wake up the next morning without hangovers. This we ask in the name of Jose Cuervo, Jack Daniels, Johnnie Walker and Jim Beam. Amen.

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

True meaning of "Khal"

I’ve been encountering lotsa comments where they misuse ‘Khal’ on Facebook like – “I van ‘khal’ em em!” “Awi! khal tops” “Tunlai chu ka ‘khal’ lutuk a” etc. which were mostly posted on a not-so-thin (read fat) girl’s pictures. How they use the word ‘khal’ here stands for ‘thau’ (fat), so when you receive a comment like “I van khal em em” – know that they meant - “You’re so fat”. Think that as an insult!

Not only in Facebook but daily conversations you heard about girls becoming “khal-er” (fatter) everyday is misleading our generation to a very serious depth of wrongness. If you have a plump figure, excess amount of flesh and people you meet everyday begins a communication by saying, “Hey, why the round face?” – You are fat, not “khal”. Abused by wrong use of the word ‘khal’ everyday, born is this post.

Khal” - a Mizo word meaning “Solid” is derived from a Latin word “Khalustas” meaning “Sexy”. I’m afraid nobody knows what is “sexy” in Latin.

In the year 1570, a young Spanish sailor Pedro de Zubiaur was on his voyage to meet the love of his life in India. Blinded by the intense eagerness to meet the lovely bird, he accidentally landed in one of the docks in Southern India. The people there are called “Khalasis” and are known for their skills, teamwork and skilled divers. Since the weather was cold and winds and tides were strong, they decided to stay for the night.

Since Pedro and his crew were in such joyful mood, they decided to enjoy the night and yet, wait for the girl there. Message was sent to the girl by carrier pigeons. During the celebration with wine, dances and singing, Pedro’s eyes were caught by an attractive young Khalasi girl who was belly dancing in front of him. Her skin was white; lips were red like cherry, her body was sexy and not fat (you know the body of swimmer). Drunken Pedro was so impressed and mumbled “Khalas…khalass……” and shouted “Khalustas”. Long story short, a Mizo guy was there.

When that Mizo guy returned to his native, he started to call every young, attractive, sexy and not-fat girls as “Khal”. He forgot the word “Khalustas” and thus, “Khal” was born. Just like the birth of “Iskut”.

Since time immemorial, “Khal” is never “fat”. There is another word – “Thau

So, use the word “Khal” wisely. And the girls who receive comments like – “I van ‘khal’ em em!” “Awi! khal tops” will know what we really mean.

And I’m not here to disgrace the fat, but please Save the Whales! Peace :D

(PS - This is an attempt at humour)

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Ka New Year's Resolution

1. "Occasionally" tih hi zirchiang lehzual deuh ila, a nihna ang takin hmang ta ila.
2. Kekawrbul hi hak zir tha ve leh ta ila.
3. Hmuihmul zuah hi chu tum tawh lo law law ila, a tum pawh hi sim hmak ta ila.
4. Badminton hi khelh leh ngei tum ila.
5. Pi Mawitei number hi delete tum ta ila.
6. Adult Joke Book ringawt lo deuh, lehkhabu tak tak hi chhiar uar chho leh tan ila.
7. Tui vawt a inbual zir ila.
8. Mawza bun apiang bun pawh (pawp) loh zir ila.
9. Alarm set na clock/phone hi mutna atanga ban phak loh ah dah tawh ila.
10. Van thengreng (Space) ah inkahchhuah ngei tum tawh ila.
11. Hmelhriat chian loh na na na hi biak chhen tum tawh lo ila. Ka hriatsual theih em avangin.
12. Ek laiin phone khawih aiah chanchinbu chhiar thin tawh zawk ila. Ek laia in "mwah" vel hi a nice loh em avangin.
13. BM-a (Zaithiam) hi chibai ngei tum tawh ila.
14. Thingpui sen hang in uar ta ila.
15. Tunlai Mizo zaimi (zaithiam) te hi hriat ve deuh hlek tum ta ila.
16. Tawng fiah deuh zir ta ila.
17. Khuma a lehling zawnga mut hi sim ila.
18. Chaw ei kham mut fit hi sim ila.
19. Kungfu hi zir belh leh deuh ila.
20. Vawksa hi chu duh reng tho ila.

Kumthar Chibai ule!