I’m going to be a father

(Happy birthday to a very special friend...enjoy. You'll know yourself :D All the story and names in the story are entirely fictional :D)

“And I'm gonna love you... like nobody loves you.... BEEP BEEP.....BEEP". Damn it, the battery just went out from a blue colored i-pod with white edges. All I could see is continuous blinking of a battery-like figure on the screen. There is no power since the last 5 hours, long enough for a sloth to cross the world. The night was dark and unruffled. No winds blowing from the west, no dogs barking, and deep stillness filled the 21st night of November.

I’ve been trying to sleep but even counting sheep would not help. Extreme repentance occupied my refractory mind. Tomorrow, just a few hours away, a new baby will be born to a grass-widow mother, whose husband is at far and away place. A husband who is a recreant and that is me. Every time I think back of the mistake I’ve done, I started my waterworks from my tear-duct, warming my cold pale cheeks. No one sees me but a solitary burning candle standing on the wooden table beside my bed.

It was on a cold night like this that I’ve made the biggest mistake in my life. A night I was blessed with all the beverages which makes my mind and thoughts run spree. I wasn’t aware of the consequences that could come, and I never knew it will.

Counting the months back, on a beautiful night in March, we were celebrating the birthday of a friend who just bid farewell to his teenage. It was a cold night as the winter is fading and summer is yet to come. Things were going so well, and I was one of the happiest guys that night being with my girl. Drinking, dancing were the only thing we could do.

After hours of consuming “liquid-snake”, and dancing with all moves, I exhausted and sleep. Sleeping like dead, can’t control myself to open my eyes just a bit more. I feel the world around me moving spiral, and my head is just a heavy lump on my jaded body.

After midnight, time ticks again from the least. I slightly opened my eyes as I was much sober than before, but dizzy as before. I saw her, sleeping next to me, folding her arms around me and her body pressed to mine. I was so tempted to do such evil things but keep controlling myself.

No man can hold long from the temptation and the well-off situation led the warm-blooded teenager who calls himself a ‘man’ into lechery and to coitus.

Hours turns into days, days turns into weeks. Not so long I got a call from her and she told me that she is gravid. I was shocked, and amazed. My heart pounded on my chest as if it wanted to come out. How can a baby be conceived with just one accident? What will I do? Wish I could hold longer from the temptation that I had some months ago.

The well-off situation that I had turns into a tragic situation. I cried and cried, not knowing what to do. Are we telling our parents first, or should we not tell them? If we tell them, we know they will be very gentle and good to us. But the hardest part is to tell them, which clearly proves we aren’t brave enough for what we’ve done.

Abortion? It needs a lot of money and I’m impecunious, and after all I don’t want her to have an abortion. She talks to me often, she couldn’t sleep at nights, and she doesn’t eat. I told her to eat healthy; I visit her regularly as she stays in a hostel far away from mine. I know it will be hard for her, and the same goes for me. If I marry her, I’m still a student and I’m not prepared. Why was I so insouciant?

We told our best friends about it. All they could imply is to tell it to our parents. I pray and pray begging for answers. Why am I so afraid? Am I a girl or something? Many people had faced the same situation like me before, some told their parents, some get married, some did abortions, and some hate each other so much that they don’t talk to each other ever again. But we aren’t like them; we like and love each other. The main reason is that we aren’t brave enough to admit what we did.

Living with all the fret and fuss makes us inhuman. We can’t get along with friends, we become short tempered. Late one night I think to myself and the best for us is to tell our parents what happened. So, I called my parents late in the night and told them about the situation. At first they were amazed and they can’t believe it happened to me.

But they are the only ones that could help us in our situation. They knew all I need is support and told me not to worry. I felt really relieved.

Things aren’t always going the way we wanted to be. Sangi’s (that’s her name if you’re wondering) parents want her to get an abortion since she was so young and no one will ever know and go on with her studies. But this wasn’t the way we wanted and my families are fully behind me. The fetus inside her wanted to be a baby. And the baby wanted to have a birthday.

So we need to part. From that day onward, I wasn’t allowed to talk to her anymore and her parent moved her into a far away place and they never told me where she is. Since then, I knew nothing about her and I am getting fully attached to my books until last night I got a mail from her.

She told me that things are going well. And that she’s going to have a baby girl and docs have told her that she’ll deliver it on 22nd November. She didn’t mention where she is and what she is doing, but she misses me. I am happy and sad the equal weight. Happy that she’s going to have her baby safe and sound. Sad that I will never be able to see her again and things cannot be turned back. I miss her so much; I’d give anything to see her once more.

Every mystery has a solution and one day I will find a way to meet her. One day I’ll be singing and dancing with her and my baby.

The ticking of the clock comes louder as I look into the wall where a gold rimed coffee colored clock is hanging. Its already 5 past 4. I could hear the birds chirping and singing happily in the morning as if they sing “Sleep tight Hminga, sleep tight…you are going to be a father”. And yes, I am going to be a father and I’m going to have a cute little baby daughter. And next year, on a night like this, you’ll be here with me with your mom, I promise.